I met someone last night.
Well, that's not exactly right. I actually "met" him back in 1994...and had known of him all of my life. But last night, I saw him with different eyes. He's always been a faithful friend, ready to listen or talk, at times (many times) he's patiently waited for me to break long silences and reconnect. But what I saw last night was humble, yet determined pursuit. All these years, I've yearned and longed for other men to pursue me and still he pursued. He's been available to me in the middle of the night when fear gripped me and in the wee hours of the morning when I just needed to hear a kind voice. He's also been faithful to speak words of truth and correction to me...and his words of reproof have broken me more than the harshest words from anyone else, though not as much as his words of love and encouragement despite my fickleness and ingratitude. In everything, He has been with me, supporting me, encouraging me, giving direction and guidance, and knowing he was there made even the most difficult ordeal not nearly as difficult as I anticipated. When there have been no comforters to be found and my tears have been my food, he was there to comfort me and speak peace to my soul...even when I ached for the comfort of another. In my pride and self-worship, I have accused him, doubted him, and resented him, yet as he looked upon me, his countenance never changed. There is always love in his eyes.
Last night, as I met with him...as I went to him hurting and missing another...I saw this. I saw his faithfulness in light of my unfaithfulness. I saw my Maker as friend, lover and husband in the purest sense of each word and rather than being crushed by my adultery and lack, I was lifted, as by the hand of my Beloved and brought into His familiar, yet strangely new embrace...and I was at rest.
"Fear not, for you will not be ashamed; be not confounded, for you will not be disgraced; for you will forget the shame of your youth, and the reproach of your widowhood you will remember no more. For your Maker is your husband, the LORD of hosts is his name; and the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer, the God of the whole earth he is called. For the LORD has called you like a wife deserted and grieved in spirit, like a wife of youth when she is cast off, says your God. Isaiah 54:4-6