Surrender

My hands hold safly to my dreams
Clutching tightly not one has fallen
So many years I've shaped each one
Reflecting my heart showing who I am
Now you're asking me to show
What I'm holding oh so tightly
Can't open my hands can't let go
Does it matter?
Should I show you?
Can't you let me go?

Surrender, surrender you whisper gently
You say I will be free
I know but can't you see?
My dreams are me. My dreams are me

You say you have a plan for me
And that you want the best for my life
Told me the world had yet to see
What you can do with one
That's committed to Your calling
I know of course what I should do
That I can't hold these dreams forever
If I give them now to You
Will You take them away forever?
Or can I dream again? ~ Barlow Girl

A poem...sorta.

There's a peace in letting go

In choosing to stop

In saying no

In not thinking about that thing

Whatever that thing may be

There's a peace in resigning

In being in today

In stopping and resting

In not letting wishes have their way

No matter how sweet they may be

There's a peace in knowing

In trusting God

In believing He is good

In waiting for His promises

Because they'll be perfect no matter what they may be

When they're done

When you're done

When He's done

When It Is Finished

You will say "Amen" and "Thank You"

"The" Game

I haven't blogged in a while. Life has been nuts! Between photography, migraines, babysitting and cantata preparations, I have had very little time. However, I try to make time for what is important: church, family, Saints games. ;) Speaking of which...did you see the game last night? Saints vs. the Patriots?!?!?! If you didn't, you missed one heck of a game! It was quite the monumental event! And I have typed a lot of "!'s" in this post. Sorry. (!)

To commemorate the night, I wrote up my own personal take on the game. Check it out. :)

There is no doubt in my mind that Saints fans will be talking about last night's game for a long, long time. No matter what any of the Saint's players say or how diplomatically they say it, last night was a pivotal win, a big win, a milestone, one for the record books, and one fans will refer to and re-live via stories and Facebook mobile uploads for years to come. Now, I'm no sports buff. Ok? I don't know all the jargon and terms or even fully understand what all the different downs mean, but I know when we're good...and last night the Saints were the best I've ever seen them in my life. Forget Archie Manning. Forget the Dome Patrol. THIS team is the realest deal if ever there was one. So...for posterity's sake, I thought it would be fun to share how I experienced "the" game and ask you to respond in turn. It should be fun, and I might cry...so here goes:

The Friday before Thanksgiving, I asked my boss for permission to host a tailgate party lunch at work on the day of this big game. I thought it would be fun for everyone to get together, munch on snacks and talk smack about the Pats. He said "ok" so long as people didn't get all nuts and come to work in body paint or anything. So, that Monday, I arrived at the office with my snacks in hand, excited for our little party and, moreso, for the big game. The last time the Saints were on Monday night football, I watched the game at home, screaming and yelling and cheering all by myself. I was certain I didn't want to do that again. Lacking any other invites or offers closer to home, I drove out to my parents house to watch the game on their 60-inch television, but not before I changed into my Saints t-shirt and drew a fleur-de-lis on my face with eyeliner. When I arrived at my parents house, the kids were nowhere near ready for the game, so...to remedy this, I wrangled up a few white t-shirts and drew fleur-de-lis on them, which they proceeded to color and embellish on their own. Then, the game began. I have to confess, through most of the 1st quarter, I was a nervous wreck. My stomach was in knots and when we ended the first drive with an almost missed field goal and the Patriots answered with a TD, I almost cried. I started bracing myself for the worst. I consoled myself, thinking, if we are going to lose, better it be to a championship team, right? I walked into the kitchen to grab a snack and mumbled "We need to get 3 interceptions in this game, too, guys." Then came the interception! That stunning McKenzie interception, which also left me wanting a good old McKenzie's kingcake...but that's another story for another day. It was then that my hope started building! With each of the following passes, tds and interceptions, I was on my feet, I was screaming, I was high fiving and then screaming again for my mom who was sick and had no voice to scream herself. But, it was the last TD, that beautiful last Marques Colston TD that sealed the deal for me. He was in the end zone with that ball securely in his hands and I burst into tears. We were up by 3 touchdowns. We were really going to win this thing! Wow! It was just amazing and I was still wiping tears from my eyes even as Darren Sharper made another interception. Then, I jumped up from the sofa and ran over to the TV screaming, joining my dad and brother. And,then the tears started flowing again. Whew! What a night! What a game! What a toll it took on my vocal chords! And, as if that wasn't enough, Belichick pulls Brady and sends in the back-up QB! The saints sent Tom Brady to the sidelines!

Seriously?

WOW!

Bless You Boys!!!

Coming out of the closet...

I have a secret. Its one I've kept for a long time. I've tried to maintain the illusion, but now, well, I've sort of been exposed and I feel like I really just need to come clean. I need to confess. I need to make a proclamation. I need to say it loud and proud and be done with it.

So...

Here goes...

I am a Saints fan. I always have been. I pretended I didn't really like football. I never told anyone about the times I snuck on to ESPN.com or the sports section of NOLA.com to check scores and stats and read articles, or about the times I listened to the game on my radio in the car all by myself.

Yes, I'm serious.

Ok, so there it is. I've said it. I feel cleansed. Slightly less girly, but cleansed just the same.

Why I don't go to the doctor...

Lately, I’ve been having a sort of dull pain in my lower back on the left side. It tends to only happen in the later part of the afternoon. Today, for whatever reason, it felt a bit worse. I told my friend about it, and said I thought perhaps I had a kidney infection or something like that. She suggested I go to the doctor. I said “Nope.” She asked why. I laughed.

And then I told her why…

Here’s what I said:

“This is how it works. K...you get an appointment. You show up 15 minutes before your appointment and pay your co-pay ($25) and then you sit in the waiting room for 15-30 minutes. After that, a nurse calls you back and weighs you and measures you and scowls at you. Then she puts you in a room to wait for the doctor. The room is freezing. You wait and stare at posters of the inside of an ear or nose or, God forbid, human genitalia, and wait some more until another nurse comes in. She takes your blood pressure and temperature and asks what's wrong with you and writes it down in a folder for the doctor. She probably also writes some notes about how fat you are and maybe draws a doodle or two. She leaves and you to wait, cold and alone, staring at the same weird posters. In desperation, you grab one of the pamphlets on the counter. It is probably about arthritis or hip replacements or some other topic totally unconnected to you, your gender or station in life. And you wait. And you are cold. And you try not to fall asleep. Then, after about 30-45 minutes the doctor arrives. He asks questions. You warm up from the sheer feeling of progress. Three to five minutes later, he says he will be right back and leaves. You feel like, this is it, its close. You are going to be home soon. Fifteen to -20 minutes later, once the warmth has left your body and your teeth are chattering, the doctor returns. He writes you a prescription and says you can go. And, you have frostbite on the tip of your nose. You also feel terrible about yourself on account of the scowls and doodles. And you feel violated on account of the weird medical posters. But, you have a prescription! It’s all going to be better! So, you proceed directly to your pharmacy and wait in line to drop it off. The clerk tells you it will be ready…in an hour. So you walk around the store aimlessly, waiting, trying not to buy a travel sewing kit or some lipstick that will no doubt turn out to be a mistake. Then, you hear your name. You pay your $20. You go home. You take the meds. And, you are better in about a week.”

To that, my friend said “Crazy.”

See, my friend lives in Canada. She just decides to go to the doctor one day and goes. She doesn’t have to make an appointment. She doesn’t have to step on a scale. And, she doesn’t have to pay. She just goes, tells them what’s wrong and walks out with pills. No co-pays. No waiting at the pharmacy. Nothing.
This, my friends, is called Utopia…and I, for one, want to live there. If for no other reason than I won’t have to look at a creepy medical poster ever again.

Happy Birthday?

Whenever we have a birthday celebration in my family, we always end up doing a really bad (annoying, ridiculous, hysterical) version of the "Happy Birthday song". This weekend was no exception as we serenaded my youngest brother, Timmy.

Check it out...

Goin' Campin'

Yep, you read that right. I'm going camping. This weekend. In the woods. Well, not so much in the woods as on a campground. But I'm sure there will be a lot of trees and stuff. There will probably be some forms of wildlife,too, like bugs and raccoons and squirrels and possibly even tigers and bears and komodo dragons. You just never know these days. I mean, if the group from Flight 815 have to fend off Polar Bears on a tropical island, I could come face to face with a komodo on a campground. Stranger things have happened.

The good news is, our camp site is very close to the restrooms, so there will be no "doing my business" in the woods. That is where I draw the line. Everyone has there limits and pooping the woods is mine.

Stay tuned for some pics from our camping adventure...